Al’s eyes were teary. He was stuck, he wanted to cry like a baby and let out all his pent up frustrations but he also wanted to remain calm, to keep believing, to appear to be in charge, but he knew he wasn’t really in charge. He kept making the same mistakes, falling into the same traps. He wasn’t stupid, he was only searching for a quick fix. Each time he thought “aha! Here it is, the answer I’ve been searching for”, he failed miserably again. In fact, the more convinced he was about the efficacy of a solution, the harder he fell. He got fragments of information from here and there. All quick fixes. They just couldn’t come together.
How many times have we thought “let’s just get this over with, I need to move on to other things”? We have so much things to do and sometimes we choose to rush through some of them. We diligently search for quick answers, so we can move on. We truly desire progress but sometimes, we are not ready to give what it takes. We do not want to be patient. We rush through some processes, we think we’ve grown, we smile and walk away. One little test and we are left wondering “I thought I dealt with this….”. We are left with questions, doubts and regrets. We get back up and go in search of yet another quick fix. The frustrating cycle continues.
How then do we break this cycle and walk away from our frustrations?
* Be honest with yourself: It’s easy to pretend a problem isn’t there when we are not ready to go through the rigours required to make that problem go away. For some, they deliberately look to other areas, while knowing exactly what the issue is and what they must do. We could try to wish the problem away, or think it away, or even occupy ourselves with other things so we could forget about it for a while. All these do not change the fact that the problem is there and it will not go away except you choose to address it appropriately. Take away those things you’ve been deliberately using to cover up your issues. The problem is still there because you’ve failed to face it head on. You keep dodging. You keep taking series of short “vacations” only to return home to meet the problems you left behind. Be honest, you need help. Be honest; those fast answers you’ve been searching for will not bring a lasting solution. Going for quick answers when you know that consistent and extensive efforts are required is like covering a whole pile of dirty dishes. The dishes will remain dirty and they won’t move an inch. Why not do the dishes now? Why cover them up and pretend they are not there? They are there and they’ll remain there except you deal with them. Accepting that an issue exists is not a sign of weakness, the true sign of weakness is pretending it doesn’t so you won’t put in the efforts required to make the problem go away.
*Simply get to work: Yes! Work! Throw yourself in totally. Choose to go through the learning process and come out with solid and permanent solutions. Let your heart be in what ever you’re doing. Be consistent, deliberate and patient. If what you need is to begin to seek opinions from people who can really help, then get on with it! You need more information? Grab as many books as you can find and begin to study intensively. Don’t be lazy. Your mind might help you project the stress you’d go through. It could bring up so many other things you could use your time, energy and money for but don’t fall into the trap of saying “well that’s true, let’s go with the simple trick, no need to spend so much time, money and energy”. Find out what you really have to do and be committed. You’ll really build strength and possess true depth by patiently and consistently working and learning to get better. Understand that the aim of whatever efforts you’re putting in is to produce measurable results, so don’t waste time on extraneous materials, stick to the plan. Stick to the recipe, you have a target, something you wish to see. Don’t stop applying whatever has been learnt. Don’t be so caught up with learning that you actually forget to apply what has been learnt, such that things you’ve learnt are just stored away somewhere.
We are capable of so much. We can give so much but our attitude to work matters a lot. We need to be ready to give our all when we desire a change. Be ready to build solid foundations and avoid cutting corners. Time and tests will distinguish the man who worked painstakingly to deal with his problems and learn, from the one who covered up his problems with blankets of quick fixes. Work pal, work.